Gossip? Tell me more!!

Gossiping, bitching, kitty party conversation, whatever you might want to call it, we love it!!

And ahem, the men love it more than us. So don’t even try to deny it.

You know how men come home and want to “discuss” their colleagues/bosses/pantry boys?

Yup, you got it.

Actually 90% of the times I can get my husband to pay attention is when I have something to tell him about xyz or I say babe call me I have gossip, and boom, the mans schedule clears up.

Couple of weeks ago we were driving, and our sole male companion decided our conversation was so good, that he was going to drive at the speed of a snail. Too juicy to miss.

Now off the bat, let me clarify, that whatever ugly name you might give this, it’s actually purging.

Do you even realise how many complex relationships we have to juggle with people we potentially despise( 99% relatives)??

All this, while adjusting our blow dried hair, smiling through clenched teeth, and imagining stabbing that person instead?

And what did you see? You saw me smiling politely while asking that nosey relative how her grandchildren and dog are. Smiling, while she suggested the gym her daughter uses, and the dietician her neighbour used. *kill kill stab stab*

What you may see from afar are the smiles and nods. Whereas inside I’m committing the goriest murder possible.

So that’s where this bitching comes in.

Trust me if we didn’t purge ourselves of these emotions often enough, the entire female population(and male, don’t exclude yourselves boys!) would be behind bars.

It’s an outlet, in so many more ways than just complaining.

Sometimes it just needs to be a one way outlet, sometimes it’s a way to seek advice, sometimes it’s a plea for help, sometimes it’s to present your case……. even though to you it may seem like the other person is making a big deal about an unreturned phone call, please understand how complex relationships can be.

Handling relationships is like ballroom dancing on top of thinly solidified lava while holding a boom box stacked on top of a bomb sandwiched between airplanes.

Comprende?

It’s exhausting, unnecessarily time consuming and the politics of it are frankly so stupid that it makes you want to pull your hair out.

And by relationships I mean work (the politics of which are aaaarrrrrggggghhhhhh), relatives (sigh), school whatsapp groups, park parents, house staff, neighbours and every other possible thing you can’t even imagine.

So excuse me if I let off a little steam every so often with my friends.

Believe me if I didn’t, I would be an axe murderer.

It’s healthy in so many ways that I cant even list.

It enables sanity, balance and perspective.

It helps better decisions, less rash behaviour and civilised exchanges even with the most vile creatures.

I mean how else do you deal with all of the storms brewing around you continuously?

So before you go bitch me out for defending the miracle of “free speech” remember how much we all love it!

Peace out!!

P.S. don’t be the fool who thinks it ok to hurt someone’s reputation or feelings by being mean. There’s a big difference between gossiping and character assassination.

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